do you know how difficult it is to change pants while drunk?

Eddie sucked jerked off an old man at work and got us movie passes, so we went out for a date tonight and saw Mission Impossible 3 to avoid dealing with Comrade’s insane ideas of painting the hallway.

We were very happy we didn’t pay for it, since it really was an overhyped bit of fluff. I firmly believe that Tom Cruise is an over-emotional pussy. But the guy with the accent? Hot. And the Lamborghini was one sexy beast.

Right now, I’ve got a good buzz. I’m sitting at my desk, typing unusually quickly for the amount of liquer I’ve had, and have been drinking vokda and coke out of a coffee mug with Eddie’s baby picture on it. Yeah. I’m feeling pretty freakin good right now. So good, in fact, that I can’t feel my face. Yes, that good.

I don’t like Tom Hanks’s new hair.

Have I mentioned that I can’t feel my cheeks right now?

License be damned, they put me to work today. I got in, ran the register in the pharmacy for the majority of the day, and at about 2:30pm they decided it was slow enough for me to go back to the bench and see how production is run.

“Have you ever counted before?” I was asked.

“Yeah. M&Ms on a paper plate with a plastic fork,” I replied.

*much laughter* “Well, here’s a bottle of Vicoden, it needs to be double counted, and there should be 30. These aren’t M&Ms.”

And so we went over labelling and scanning and counting and all that fun stuff, and I got to pull a few things off the shelf before I came to the rescue and went back up to the counter to ring because someone was going to lunch and the only person not doing anything is a newly-hired tech with less experience than me.

Eddie and I are drinking. I’m drinking Mike’s Hard Berry, and he’s got beer. I’m not pacing myself. With any luck we’ll end up drunk and misbehaving just like the last time we had booze in the house.

It was a pretty uneventful night here at Casa McBride.  Neither of us got drunk or even got a good buzz off our Green Apple Cokes, we never did watch Young Guns, and we did end up watching the sparkly ball drop.  Balls of the other sort were not to be seen, but I did get a good kiss at midnight and we hugged the ferret when she woke up, so there was plenty of love in the house.
We were sitting around doing nothing at about 11pm when a fight broke out across the street.  From what I could tell, the guy who lives across the street had said something to his nephew along the lines of “if you do anything that hurts your mother [his sister] I’ll have you put in jail.” The nephew then proceeded to make one of those completely dumbass threats where you just reverse the first threat and proceeded to tell his uncle “if anything happens to my mother I’ll have you put in jail!”  Much yelling ensued.  Then the women got involved, and there was plenty of “We’s family and family’s all we got!” and “What good are you if you’re in jail and she’s in a shelter?” The cops drove down the street once and checked things out and told the nephew to calm down, and someone (I think his sister) told the cop everything was under control and it was just a family issue, nothing to worry about, and the cop drove off.
Needless to say, Comrade spent the better part of the midnight hour pacing across the living room floor to check things out.  According to the guy across the street, Comrade is a bit scared of big black men, which would explain why he didn’t go out there and tell them off like he’d normally do.

When everything quieted down I almost expected Jerry Springer to pop out from behind a bush and offer a final thought.

We’re planning on staying in tonight and tomorrow.  We bought $50 worth of food and crap at the store before Eddie left tonight, so we’ve got enough to get us to Sunday when we go to Mom’s house.  Tonight?  Buffalo chicken strips and fries, with assorted alcoholic beverages made from the leftover booze in the booze cabinet.  So far we each have a vodka and Coke, which uses up all the vodka in the house.  We’ve also got a large bottle of tequila brought direct from Mexico and half a small bottle of Jägermeister that I bought last spring.  Obviously, I don’t imagine that either of us will be able to type by the end of the night, and to make matters more interesting, Eddie’s making a packy-run tomorrow because we conveniently live around the corner from a small store that has a decent selection of decent and not so decent booze.

For some reason, I imagine that tomorrow he’ll come home with something good for himself, and a $2 bottle of Mad Dog or Midnight Hobo or Old English for me.  *blech*  As long as it’s something good, I’ll drink it, and I have a feeling that this might be a rather blurry weekend.  This can be a good thing, because while I’m drunk Eddie is more easily seduced by my womanly wiles, and if the sex is as good as it was last night (ever had great sex and wake up still horny?  I was like that all day), I hope that I can remember it.
Pickle is starting to be a bit less obsessive about the back of the TV stand, although she does still go back there at least once a day.  She’s also picked up a few peculiar habits that are absolutely adorable.

First of all, she’s developed a habit of kissing me.  Or, at least that’s what I call it when I pick her up and she proceeds to make out with my chin.  She’ll sit there for 5 minutes or so and just slather me with little ferrety kisses until I finally have to put her down because it tickles too much.

Second, she sings.  Unfortunately I’m the only one who has seen this yet.  I had wound up a Christmas ornament with a music box in it, and she ran all around the living room dooking the entire time that it was playing.  I wound it back up a few times just to see it happen again, but she wouldn’t repeat her performance later when Eddie was home.

She’s still loving her long tube.  This afternoon she ran through it about 10 times at full speed, running out of the end and spinning around to run back into the same end, only to come out of the other end.  It was really, really cute.  Loud, because not only was she running through the foil tube as though I had plans to eat her, but she had left one of her plastic balls in the rube so that was making noise as well.  Add to the mess the sound of her bolting out and sliding across the hardwoods and you can imagine what it sounded like.