Today was one of those days at work that wasn’t entirely bad. The phone system was fucked, which is bad for the customers who are too dumb to figure out that the girls at the front registers are perfectly capable of getting the pharmacy to answer it (eventually, anyway). However, that made things slow enough where we could stand around and bullshit. And in case any of my bosses ever reads this, by “bullshit” I really mean “giving each patient the individualized care that they require.”

Topics of today’s discussions were as follows:

• regarding Bette Midler’s song “From A Distance”: If God is watching us, does that make him a stalker? Is he watching us while we shower?
• if Santa sees us when we’re sleeping and knows when we’re awake, is he a stalker as well? And since he watches kids, does that make him a pedophile?
• things that would be on Supertech’s “wheel of reasons why I can’t date you”
• things that would be on our “wheel of early refill excuses”

It’s never a dull moment in there, really. Just before I left there was this really nasty couple buying syringes. Let me offer up some advice to any IV drug users out there. Please do not hurry your ass to the pharmacy counter for your syringes and then in the next breath ask if you can use the bathroom. Please do your shit in the parking lot of the bar behind us like all the other druggies, ok?

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