What She Writes:

Please check the overdraft transactions made on 11/30, 11/28. I do not seem to understand because I had money deposited for every check made.Please reply as soon as possible.

What I Respond With:

In response to your email, your account became overdrawn on 11/26, leaving your balance at -$98.98 at the end of that business day. This was caused by check #3949 for $47 and #3944 for $212. Because of this, you were charged $60 ($30 for each item presented against insufficient funds) on 11/27. On 11/27, 6 items were presented to your account against insufficient funds: check #3953 for $37.22, #3957 for $25, #3952 for $75.11, and debit card purchases at Tupperware for $19.82, Petland for $16.02, and $11.15 at Today’s Kids. These 6 items overdrew your account even further, leaving your balance at $364.18 at the end of the business day, and causing a $180 overdraft fee to be assessed to your account on 11/29/01. On 11/29, a debit card purchase for $11.66 for Tupperware was presented against your account against insufficient funds, and you were subsequently charged a $30 fee on 11/30/01. Please note that in order to get an accurate balance of your account so that you have sufficient funds to cover checks or debit card purchases, you should maintain an up to date check register as you make these transactions. Since checks will not post against your account until they are presented for payment, it is possible for debit card purchases to be posted against funds that you may have intended to use for checks you had written. When you make a purchase using your debit card, the funds are verified and placed on hold at the time of the transaction, and will cause an overdraft if you do not have sufficient funds in your account at the time the merchant provides us with the debit authorization. If you have any further questions, please contact us.

What We Want to Say:

In response to your email, you do not deserve a checking account. We have taken the funds out of your account and split them equally among the Online Banking Group. Your checking account has been closed, and we have opened you a Passbook savings account, since you obviously can not be trusted with a checking account.

Grrr…. can these people not do simple math?

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